Vampires (1998)

Synopsis

Jack Crow must stop at nothing to retrieve an ancient relic before all vampires can walk in the sun.

Thoughts

John Carpenter has brought us some of the best, awesome and funnest films of all time in my opinion. Halloween, his remake of The Thing, Escape From New York, Christine, Big Trouble in Little China. The list goes on. Sure, The Village of the Damned remake may have been a bad call and Escape From L.A. wasn't as great as it's predecessor, but John Carpenter definitely made up for it with Vampires.

Let's see. I think the number of decent movies based around vampires can be counted on maybe two hands. Of course, you got the classics like Nosferatu and Dracula. How can you forget about Scream, Blacula Scream? John Carpenter's vision is a tad more gruesome than these classics and often at times cheesier than Blacula. Didn't even think that was possible. Well, with this cast, I had my suspicions. That, and it has the same feel as Escape From L.A. On a side note, I consider this part of a an unofficial trilogy. Escape From L.A., Vampires and The Ghost of Mars all have the same feel to them. The acting, the directing, the overall tone of the films. 

The plot isn't hard to follow, but it is a decent story. Vampire Slayers hunt vampires, kill vampires, upsets master vampire, Valek, slays entire team, James Woods seeks revenge with Daniel Baldwin. Technically, James Woods has been hunting Valek before the whole slaying of his team, but nothing makes a plot more fun than revenge! Slight sarcasm, but it did help. The rest of the plot is them finding Valek and an ancient cross before he makes it to where all vampires can walk in the sun. 

James Woods plays our hero,Jack Crow, and is great in this movie. Funny, sarcastic and often at times a bit of an asshole. Well, that's typical Woods actually, but he really pulled it off here. Poor Daniel Baldwin. The only thing he's go going for him here is the fact that he's a Baldwin. Still doesn't help. You could blame it on his dialogue, but if you've seen him in other movies. then you know that he just can't act. It really didn't help that he had those typical cheesy sidekick one liners either. "Nothing like a little head, ey padre?" I rest my case. For all the Twin Peaks fans out there, Sheryl Lee, who played Laura Palmer, plays a hooker turned vampire. Not the role of the century, but she's better than Baldwin, even with half her dialogue being hissing noises. Speaking of noises, let us not forget the hilarious crow like squeal Valek, played by Thomas Ian Griffith, makes after being shot in the face. 

The vampires in this aren't as detailed as those in From Dusk til Dawn. They're very simple looking. Pale faces with vampire fangs and piercing eyes. They also don't turn into a giant puddle of green goo and guts, or a bucket of blood after being stabbed in the heart. The only way to completely destroy these vampires is to pull them into the sun via a crossbow attached to a winch. When met with the sun, they light up like a bunch of road flares. 

As for the blood used in Vampires, what we do see of it is quite a site. Most of the blood in the film that you'll see is used in the hotel massacre scene. I wondered why for a movie like this, why wouldn't there be more? You know, vampires require blood as their sustenance after all. Somehow, Vampires pulls it off without the over the top blood and gore. It just didn't feel necessary and I guess John Carpenter knew that. Then again, he can tell a good story without having to saturate it over the top blood and gore. 

Vampires is a thrill ride of a film. Action, horror, subtle humor and tasteful blood use make it a nice addition to the vampire genre. A good time for all to be had. Worth a rent, purchase or DVR space. So, if you find yourself wanting something as entertaining as Near Dark, or The Lost Boys, give John Carpenter's Vampires a try.

IMDB: 6.1/10

Rotten Tomatoes: 5.1/10

WeFLM: 6.5/10

Come for the hotel massacre. Stay for Daniel Baldwin's one liners.

-kp